Rock Bottom


How did i get to the hospital?

Hey, it’s Jake again, and we are getting close to the end of my story.

My last post was about how I progressed from pain pills to heroin. This was about a year after I left the military, so I was 23 years old and helplessly addicted to heroin. While most of my former friends from high school were graduating college and starting jobs, and some were even getting married, I was living at my mom’s house getting high every day.

My mom and brother still had no idea what was going on. They knew I was depressed and suffering from PTSD, but they didn’t know about the drugs. The days I spent in bed started out as a result of depression, but didn’t change much once I was on heroin. I was still staying in bed all day, I just felt better about it.

Rock bottom came the day I woke up in the hospital with no idea how I got there.

The last thing I remember, I was having my afternoon smoke right before my mom and brother came home for the day. My routine was to wake up and smoke after they went to work and school, then again right before they came home, then again after they went to bed so I virtually never had to be sober and they never knew. I smoked and went to take a nap.

My mom was in the hospital room with me when I woke up, and she started crying. Apparently, I had overdosed on heroin and nearly died. I had smoked so much that my breathing and heart rate had slowed down to a dangerous rate and my brain wasn’t getting enough oxygen. I was lucky not to have any permanent damage.

My mom had come to get me from my nap for dinner and couldn’t wake me up. She called an ambulance, and they treated me for a heroin overdose.

My mom was shocked and blamed herself for my addiction. I felt terrible. Obviously, none of it was her fault, and I felt horrible for letting her down. I was so ashamed of my drug abuse. I knew I couldn’t leave the hospital and go back to drugs. I had to admit I had a problem and get help.

Looking back, I’m oddly grateful in a way for my drug addiction, because without it I might never have gotten treatment for my PTSD and depression.

Keep reading to learn about treatment and how I started to turn my life around.

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